Friends can help you with your mental health in lots of different ways. They might check in with how you are feeling, or simply make you laugh with the best TikToks. They might also help you by:
If you are finding things difficult, talking things through with a friend can help you understand how you are feeling and what support you might need. It might even be that they just sit and listen. A friend can be there for you by listening to how you are feeling and keep you company to remind you that you are not alone.
For example, if you are nervous about going to a party, friends can help you by going to the party with you, messaging you to see how you are getting on or helping you find a quiet space.
They can take your mind off what might be making you feel low or stressed.
Friends that know you well might recognise if you are struggling or not feeling your best and can check-in to see if you need support.
When friends help and support you, they can boost your self-esteem, make you feel good, and remind you that you are loved for who you are. They can help you to look after your mental health.
Our Activists and other young people like you, share how their friends have helped them with their mental health.
Talking to a friend about your mental health is one of the first steps on the road to feeling better. But sometimes, this can feel quite scary. You might not know what to say, or you might be nervous about sharing how you are feeling. That’s okay! Here are some tips that can help:
Remember: Good friends will want to be there for you so you don’t have to struggle alone. For more tips, have a look at our page on reaching out for help.
Throughout our lives, we might struggle with our friendships. We might argue with friends, no longer speak to friends we were once close to, or we might lose some friendships. You might struggle with a friend because:
We might have arguments with friends, and sometimes fall out, but often you can get through those difficult moments together. You or your friend may not have realised how each other were feeling or understood what either of you were going through.
By talking things through and explaining how you both feel, you can both learn to better understand how you can support each other. Overcoming these tough times together can sometimes help make your friendship stronger.
Here's a short message to remind you that better days are coming.
Video description: Charis is a Black young person wearing a green cardigan and glasses. They are in a room with plants and books and are sharing a message in British Sign Language. The message is 'Everything in life is temporary, so when life is good make sure you enjoy and receive it fully. And when life isn’t good remember that it will not last forever and better days are on the way. And staying positive does not mean you have to be positive all the time because that is not possible. It means that even in the hard days, there are better days coming.'
40 second watch
In some situations, however, your friendship might come to an end. You may have tried to work through an argument and it hasn’t worked out, or they may have not been very nice to you.
Friendships can come to a natural end too. There might not be a specific reason, but you might no longer keep in touch. Sometimes people grow apart and that’s okay.
When friendships come to an end, it can be really tough. Friends are there through the highs and lows – they can be like our chosen family, meaning that it can feel tough to move on - but things can get better over time.
If someone close to you passes away, it can be extremely difficult. Jacob shares how he coped with the death of his best friend and Nia shares advice on how she coped with losing a friendship.
If you have lost a friend, our page has advice if you’re finding it hard to cope.
Our Activists share their tips on what to do if you're struggling with a friendship.
While occasional arguments or disagreements can be normal between friends, there are times when friendships can become unhealthy and affect you in a negative way. This can be things like:
Sometimes, friends might do these things unintentionally or without realising, or they might continue to do them after you’ve asked them to stop. Ultimately, it’s about how you feel about the friendship.
If you’re finding a friendship difficult, you might want to talk to that friend about how they have been treating you. You might be nervous about talking to them, or worried about how they will react. Childline have some tips on how you can talk to your friend and be assertive to explain how you feel.
If your friend is constantly asking you for help but you’re not sure what to say, it can make you feel stressed or anxious. Our page on how to support a friend with their mental health has tips on how you can set boundaries and look after your mental health, which you may find helpful.
When a friendship becomes unhealthy, it can impact other areas of your life and how you think and feel. It can make you feel down or anxious, or might lower your self-esteem and how you feel around other people. If you feel like this, it’s important that you are able to get help. Even when you disagree with friends, you still deserve to be treated with kindness and respect.
It’s normal for people to compare themselves to their friends and peers, and often the influence of your friends can have a positive role in shaping your identity. Sometimes though, the influence of your friends and peers can be a cause of stress.
If you feel like you’re being pressured by friends or peers into doing something that you don’t want to do, this is called peer pressure. For example, you might feel pressured to take drugs or drink alcohol, to take dangerous risks when driving, or to have sex before you feel ready. If you are in a situation like this, it’s important to say how you feel and that you don’t want to take part. If your friends keep trying to get you to take part, speak to a trusted adult about how you are feeling. You need to make sure you are safe, so if you do feel at risk, you should reach out to professional services.
You may worry that by not doing something that your friends are doing, you will be left out, or it will damage your friendship.
But remember, a good friend won’t pressure you to do anything you’re not comfortable with.
You deserve to have friends that accept your decisions and make you feel as though your feelings are valid.
Below are some tips to help you cope with peer pressure. Rose, 20, also shares her advice in our blog.
If you feel uncomfortable in any way, it means that something about the situation is wrong for you. Listen to that feeling and be confident in making your decision.
Decide on a pre-planned excuse that you can use if you want to get out of a situation. For example, if you wanted to leave a party, you could say you need to get up early the next morning for something you have to do.
Remember that you deserve to have friends that accept your decisions and make you feel comfortable. Choose friends that will listen to your feelings and speak up for you when you’re in need of moral support.
If you want to go to an event like a party, and you think it might be possible you’ll be offered drugs or alcohol that you don’t want, plan ahead for how you’ll handle the situation. Decide ahead of time what you’ll say – you could even rehearse saying it.
Remember what is important to you and what your values are. For example, if you don’t want to smoke, try and be confident with that decision. You may find that friends and peers respect that confidence.
You might also experience peer pressure when looking at other people’s posts and images on social media. Often, other people’s posts can make you feel like you need to be following the same kind of lifestyle. For help and advice on using social media, read our guide to social media and mental health.
If you are struggling with a friend and not sure who to talk to, there are people who will help you get through this. Here are some organisations that can provide you with support.
If you’re under 19 you can confidentially call, chat online or email about any problem big or small.
Sign up for a free Childline locker (real name or email address not needed) to use their free 1-2-1 counsellor chat and email support service.
Can provide a BSL interpreter if you are deaf or hearing-impaired.
Hosts online message boards where you can share your experiences, have fun and get support from other young people in similar situations.
Offers confidential advice and support for young people struggling with suicidal thoughts, as well as family and friends; and information about how to make a safety plan.
Its helpline service - HOPELINE247 - is available to anybody under the age of 35 experiencing suicidal thoughts, or anybody concerned that a young person could be thinking of suicide.
Whatever you're going through, you can contact the Samaritans for support. N.B. This is a listening service and does not offer advice or intervention.
Whether you love the page or think something is missing, we appreciate your feedback. It all helps us to support more young people with their mental health.
Please be aware that this form isn’t a mental health support service. If you are in crisis right now and want to talk to someone urgently, find out who to contact on our urgent help page.
At YoungMinds we take your privacy seriously. If you’d like to read more about how we keep the information we collect safe, take a look at our privacy policy.
